One now at a time

Commitments for this semester (in no particular order):

• 6 courses (assignments, readings, exams)
• weekly blogs
• family and friends time
• self care (exercises, breaks, meals, sleep, water)
• interests (choir, events, art, books)

In the past three years, I often tried to play catch up by trying to adjust my speed to what I thought it should be, and by what I saw in others. But that only made me tired, unhappy, unmotivated and stressed. Always thinking about what to do next, and waiting for the end result. I just couldn’t keep up, and I didn’t even want to try anymore. And why should I? I couldn't see why. Eventually I learned the importance of finding my own pace by going through one moment at a time. If I’m not doing something, then I probably shouldn’t be thinking about it. Like right now, I’m writing this blog, but I’ve thought about upcoming assignments and readings I need to do at least once, since I started writing. And just like that, I find myself drifting between worrying about what else I have to do and what I’m doing now. But once I realize it, I can make a clearer decision. I can either continue what I was doing before, or drop it and address what’s on my mind. So, I can either continue writing this blog, or worry about another assignment that’s due this week, or start another assignment. And that has gone a much longer way than trying to do one thing and think about something else at the same time. Because I can’t do everything at once, but I can do one thing at a time. And even though I may have quite a list of commitments this year, I’m taking it slow with each one to be fully present, because that’s the best that I can do. Slow and steady, not to win a race, but to enjoy the journey. To absorb as much as I can from what I find along the way. Maybe it's because I’ve recently read The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle, or maybe it’s the fourth year wisdom, but anyhow I’m learning to commit to the moments and bask in all the gifts the present has to offer. I can also see that my fellow bloggers are going at their owns paces, and we're each going through life at U of T, One day at a time. One class at a time. One lesson at a time. One reading at a time. One assignment at a time. One exam at a time. One event at a time. One meal at a time. One movie at a time. One break at a time. One conversation at a time. One breath at a time. One now at a time. What is your now?