(7-minute read)

By Leslie Lara, Master of Education Candidate and Peer Mentorship Coordinator

There is a particular kind of question student parents learn to ask quietly. 

“Is it okay if my child comes with me?” 

I have asked it before meetings. I have asked it at the entrance of campus spaces that look open but not necessarily welcoming. I have asked it before attending events I genuinely wanted to join. 

Most of the time, the answer has been kind. People have said yes. They have smiled. They have moved a chair to make space. 

And yet, asking carries its own weight. 

Because when you have to ask every time, you are reminded that you might be an exception. As a student parent, the university can feel like two parallel worlds. There is the academic world of seminars, research, and deadlines. Then there is the family world of school pickups, snack containers in my bag, and the quiet calculation of how long my child can sit before getting restless. 

When those worlds overlap, the experience often depends on individual goodwill rather than clear institutional signals. 

I have been fortunate to encounter welcoming faculty, staff, and student leaders. But I still scan event descriptions carefully. If an invitation does not explicitly mention whether children are welcome, I hesitate. If a study space does not visibly signal that families can use it, I wonder whether I am bending an invisible rule. 

That quiet uncertainty shapes decisions. Sometimes it means staying home. 

This is why the Supporting Student Parents virtual toolkit feels so relevant. Developed by the Family Care Office and U of T’s Innovation Hub, the toolkit is designed specifically for faculty, staff, and student leaders who want to better support student parents across campus. It offers practical guidance on event planning, communication, space usage, and policy awareness that can make inclusion visible and tangible rather than implied. 

When I read through the toolkit website, I could immediately imagine how different my daily experience might feel if these practices were widely adopted. For example, something as simple as clearly stating in an event description that children are welcome would remove hesitation before it even begins. Flexible participation options for meetings or workshops would acknowledge that caregiving responsibilities do not disappear during academic hours. Visible signage in common areas could signal that families belong there without requiring a personal negotiation at the door. 

At the same time, it is reasonable to recognize that not every institutional space or event can be family friendly. Some settings require quiet concentration, confidentiality, or physical limitations that make it difficult to accommodate children. In those cases, the question becomes not whether student parents can attend with their children, but how they can still participate meaningfully. Clear communication about available childcare options, short-term funding supports, or referrals to campus resources can make the difference between exclusion and access. When these supports are visible and easy to navigate, student parents are not left to solve logistical challenges alone.  

The toolkit also encourages a broader cultural shift. It invites faculty, staff, and student leaders to consider how syllabi, deadlines, and expectations can be communicated with an awareness that some students are balancing research and coursework alongside bedtime routines and school schedules. That kind of recognition does not lower academic standards. It reduces unnecessary stress and contributes to a more inclusive and diverse student environment. 

For student parents, inclusion is often not about large structural changes. It is about predictability. It is about knowing that bringing a child to a campus space will not require explanation. It is about being able to focus on a seminar discussion instead of worrying whether my presence is inconvenient. 

The Supporting Student Parents toolkit initiative sits within a broader network of supports offered by the Family Care Office, including information on child care, financial assistance, and family friendly campus spaces.  

When faculty and staff engage with these tools, the impact is tangible. It shifts the experience from conditional inclusion to intentional welcome. 

Universities often speak about belonging. For student parents, belonging is felt in practical ways. It is felt in the wording of an email. In a clearly marked space. In a policy that anticipates caregiving realities rather than reacting to them. 

Sometimes inclusion begins with not having to ask.