Balancing Parenting and Working from Home by Fostering Self-Help Skills in Children

Authored by University of Guelph student Megan Coghill

With many parents working or completing school from home due to Covid-19 it can be challenging to avoid distractions. Fostering self-help skills in your children is especially useful while trying to balance parenting and other commitments. Furthermore, increasing independence allows your children to feel an improved sense of autonomy.

Steps for Fostering Self-help Skills: 

1. Create a list of the most common distractions and requests from your child. Identify skills that are within your child’s developmental capacity to learn that could allow them to complete tasks on their own. For example, toddlers and preschoolers that are typically developing can be working toward dressing themselves and performing hygiene tasks like washing their hands and face.
   
   
2. Select one to five skills that you would like to work on with your child. It may be beneficial to ask your child which skills they would most like to learn. Break the tasks down into simple steps and write them down in order. Visuals are especially helpful! You will be able to find instruction charts with pictures for most self-help skills through a quick internet search. Place the step-by-step instructions and pictures in the relevant place (i.e. dressing instructions on the closet door).
   
   
3. Remove barriers that your child may encounter while working on the selected self-help skills. Your child may be ready to demonstrate many self-help skills if they are given the proper tools and support. For example, you may need to provide a stool to reach the sink or cupboard. Limiting the number of options available can make a task seem less overwhelming, such as having a specific cupboard with a couple healthy snacks available or choosing clothes the night before.
   
   
4. Find a time that you can focus on practicing the skill with your child. Begin by guiding your child through each step and gradually reduce your prompts until they can follow the steps on their own. Be patient as they learn new skills and reward them for their effort. If they are struggling with a certain skill, ask how you can assist them and aim to resolve any issues they encounter.
   
   
5. Develop a reward system. You may find it useful to create a sticker chart to display your child’s progress toward each self-help skill. This is a great way for your child to visualize their progress toward independence. Additionally, use specific praise and let your child know how their hard work and emerging skills are helping you. For example, you could say, “I really appreciate that you prepared yourself a snack so that I can finish my meeting!”
   
   
6. As your child develops their self-help skills and becomes more confident with their abilities, you can restart the process with new skills! 

Lastly, continue to take breaks throughout the day to spend time with your child. This is important for your own well-being to maintain a balance between work and life. During this time, many children are adjusting to spending more time around the house, especially with busy parents. Promoting independence in your child should be balanced with showing how much you care for them by spending quality time together when possible.